Survivor Vocabulary #10: “Laziness”
[trigger warning: mention of triggers and flashbacks]
Because abuse and sexual abuse often come with a constellation of after effects and illnesses (phobias, PTSD, anxiety, fibromyalgia, etc), many survivors often miss school, work, or other appointments. This means that they face, both internally and externally, the specter of “laziness”.
A person who has to hide away from the world because they are having an extra triggering day will devalue their experience and their feelings, even when those feelings and memories seem completely real and tangible. But needing space for yourself is not laziness; it is self-love and survival. Sometimes, strength means knowing when you must allow yourself time away from the world.
Survivors of abuse are not lazy— in fact, they work just as hard, if not harder, than those around them. It’s just that the majority of our struggle is invisible and internal. When getting out of bed means having to face your demons, it can be as difficult as running a marathon or climbing a mountain. Just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean we’re not trying as best as we can.
I needed to reread this today. <3