Posts tagged virginity.
Remember when Carlton lost his virginity?
Emily Maguire in ‘Like a Virgin’ for The Monthly (via monocled—misanthrope)
basically, young (cis) boys are taught to be predators. young (cis) girls are taught to be prey.
Yep, and cis girls who speak of their own pleasure as a priority are immediately demonized for the temerity of seeing their bodies as their own. Meanwhile cis boys are supposed to seek pleasure at every opportunity.(via karnythia)
— Kerry Howley (via shittyweekend)
A wise woman once told me: You don’t lose your virginity when you have sex. You don’t “lose” anything. You gain an experience and you have your sexual debut.
I feel like this can apply to anyone. Whether you’re saving your first time for marriage or you’re simply waiting til it’s right for you and your parter I don’t think sex means loss. I think the concept of “losing” a piece of you is harmful to peoples’ minds. Like you’re less of a person because of having sex? Anyways, sexual debut is kind of an awesome term.
VIRGINITY IS A SOCIAL CONSTRUCT
- is sexist
- is heteronormative
- commodifies sex
- commodifies young cis-het white women
- contributes to rape culture
- contributes to slut-shaming
- erases queer folk
- erases transfolk
- frames a woman’s worth as inversely proportional to the number of dicks that have been inside her
i wish that instead of calling it “losing your virginity,” everyone refer to it as your “sexual debut”
I really love this.
ooh i really like that. i think imma use that term
I shall also start using this.
That’s a great step toward eliminating the “virgin-whore” conundrum that’s still evident in society. I’m down for this.
Sexual debut into sexual society.
I am most definitely down with that new terminology, since there it’s a lot more positive what we’ve been using now.
I can dig it!!!
“talking about virginity is so annoying to me, and here’s why- firstly it’s used as a tool. A tool to reinforce the virgin vs. slut mentality that keeps a lot of girls scared to death because you’re either a cute little virgin or a good-for-one-thing slut, with seemingly no in-between. God forbid a girl has fun right? God forbid she has some nice fun sex and feels all good inside. It’s wrong if a girl does it, and wrong if a guy doesn’t. At least that’s what we’re told. It reinforces the idea that girls should be quiet, conservative, pure, lovely little darlings and guys should be tough conquerors. The virginity myth hurts both genders. And it is a myth. Who the fuck decided that a cock in my vagina is the end of my innocence and purity but a cock in my mouth isn’t? What if I touch it..lick it a little..it goes in but doesn’t pop my cherry..then we decide to stop..What am I then? Am I officially ‘deflowered’ now or am I still a pure little virgin? What if I get raped? And finally your comment just pisses me off. I can’t even tell you how many guys have said that to me so listen: I’m not some gift you get to be excited about opening before any other boys have. I’m not an object, a trophy, a body, a label or any of the fictional categories humanity just loves to stuff itself into to regulate behavior. And if it’s not your comment, it’s these: “oh that’s so good for you! You should really keep it,” or “oh god you shouldn’t do that.” First thing everyone does when you mention your virginity is tell you what to do with it. No. Shut up and stop condescending to me. I’m not an innocent child just because I haven’t and you’re not a big strong man because you have. And I know society has taught you to value virginity in a girl and that as a guy you’re supposed to be the authority on sex but seriously, pull your head out of your ass- sex is natural and awesome and I can decide exactly when and when not to keep my legs shut.” —mutualaddiction responding to an ask saying she was hot because she was a virgin (via sftatls)
this obsession with virginity needs to end. its exclusive for people who are queer/trans/anyone who doesn’t fit the straight cis mold and I’m sick of all this internalized bullshit that makes me think I’m not worth anything because I’ve had sex. and there’s the whole problem of virgin-shaming and it’s all just bullshit and needs to go.